Assalamualaikum. In shaa Allah in just less than 15 days, I will be someone's wife. I'm nervous like hell but to be honest I'm relieved to actually bring my relationship to 'halal' status (^.^) Haha. No matter how excited we are to be pronounced as a husband and wife, we realised that we both have worries  and insecurities about our future together. Hence, I'm writing this letter for you my love, about things that I might not have guts to say but I think you need to know how I truly feel about it. Of course I'm not posting it in Facebook since I feel just fine to write for my blog since there's no one will read it anyway *shrug*

The Thank You's

First of all, I want to start this letter by thanking you for all of the things that you have done for me. It sounds cliche but I think it is the best and suitable expression that I can use to describe how thankful I am to have you in my life. Thank you for always be there for me whenever I needed you even though we are in long distance relationship for two years (and counting) now. Thank you for always be faithful to me no matter how unfair the treatment that I gave to you. Thank you for all the time that you have spent and wasted on me, back and forth to Kuantan-JB-Kuantan just to see me every month. Of course, thank you for all the money that you have saved, for my hantaran and all the expenses that you have spent to make me happy (flowers, food, presents and your expenses going to JB). There's no words can describe how I'm touched with all the things that you have done for me. To be honest, I dont think I would be able to repay all of the love that you gave to me. You made me feel like a princess with your love. You taught me what a love is. Thank you. Thank you so much. 

Things I want you to know

1. To be a wife (soon) will be tough on me and maybe it would be difficult on you too, as a husband. We both are newbies in this marriage world, and I really hope we both can help each other to get use to it. I am an independent person, so it is hard for me to resist myself for doing things alone, and I know at some point, you do not like because you might feel that I disregard you as my husband. However, it is something that out of my control. I'm so used to make my own decision and to do everything by myself since I'm the eldest and you know how my family relies on me so much. Therefore, if I ever made you feel ignored and disregard, I'm sorry. Please, please tell me nicely that I need to think about you and our family too. 

2. You knew that I have sleeping disorder which is bruxism. I might make too much noise while I'm sleeping. I really hope that you could stand me for you whole life and I promise I will do the teeth guard when I have money to do so. If you think I'm making too much noise until you lose  a wink to sleep, can you just wake me up and I will move to other place to sleep. Hahaha yeah, I would do that because I know it's hard to sleep beside a person who have bruxism. 

3. I'm a hotpot. You knew that VERY well isn't? Since it is in my blood to be easily get mad and irritated with things that I dont like, I hope you could hand me more patience that you have given me for the past three years. Our problems/ conflict  in marriage might be bigger than we have faced up till now, therefore, I may show you unpleasant gestures (such as jeling, buat muka and those stuff) and maybe I raise (unintentionally) my voice to you. Once again, I'm sorry in advance about things that I would do to you. I'm still trying to get rid this habit and I hope you could understand. I hope you can treat me nicely regardless how rude I am to you. I think, as a husband you must help me to be more chill and calm whenever we're in the rough boat. 

4. Despite of all the imperfections that I have (now and then) , I hope you can accept me with open heart since our true colours will be truly shown (more) after we both got married. I hope we both can embrace the flaws and use the flaws to tighten our love as a husband and wife <3

For now, that's all that I want you to know. Marriage is not easy but I know, with you it will be effortless. Let's build a happy family here and in Jannah (in shaa Allah). Cant wait for an exciting life adventure with you :)